I want to move abroad – but how?

February 21, 2015 ~ Kate Wilson ~ 3 Comments

The Dream

You want to change your life and move abroad but you just don’t know where to start. You have a home and a job and basically you’re quite happy but….. you have always dreamed of living in a different country and learning a new language. You wonder how you would manage in a totally different setting. Other people have done it but somehow for you the dream always stays the same – only a dream.

How can you make it happen?

People often say this to me. There are many reasons for moving to a new country but one that comes up again and again is that you just want to give it a try. It feels like it would be an exciting adventure and you really want to give it a go.

The thing is knowing where to start.

How do you move from just dreaming to making it real? How do you get from one place to another? It can feel impossible to even imagine.

Here is what happened to me. Perhaps it will inspire you.

I was living in Cornwall, in my own beautiful cottage in the countryside. I had two beautiful dogs and two equally wonderful cats. I ran my own acupuncture practice and over 15 years had built up a great network of friends and clients. My life felt safe and secure and fulfilling.

But niggling in the background was my dream. I had always dreamt of moving abroad and trying to make a new life in a totally different place. I also wanted to learn a new language.

You know how you make New Year resolutions? Well ever since I was about 10 I had one that said “I want to speak another language”

So, here in 5 steps is how I made the move. I didn’t know there were 5 steps at the time – I just followed my nose and kept the dream alive.

Follow your passion

I know this is a cliché but it was exactly what got me out of my old life and into the new. My passion was, and is, tango. I was willing to open myself up and to visit new places in order to dance. I was part of a small group that organised tango in our town and I also taught beginners’ classes. I wasn’t a very confident person but tango was like a shot of something strong and potent and it gave me courage. When the chance arose to go to Barcelona I put my hand up and said ‘Yes’. In this first trip I fell in love with the city. I already felt like a changed person.

moving to Barcelona — Tango in the Park in Ciutadella

Follow up

For several years I returned again and again to Barcelona. As often as I could get away. I made it a priority and each time I was there I made new friends and felt more comfortable with both the language and the culture. I started to learn Spanish again and I kept in touch with my new friends.

spanish lessons — I was always the oldest in the class!

moving abroad — my first Orxata aka nectar from heaven

Share with other people

Other people were very important in this process. I visited and spent time with my Catalan friends and they also came to see me in Cornwall. Every time I went away, friends in the UK stayed in my cottage to take care of my animals. The idea of actually living in Barcelona started to take form. Two of my Catalan friends wanted to come and practise English in Cornwall and I helped them find somewhere to stay. It was a magical time because help was flowing between lots of different people. One of my Cornwall friends needed someone to take care of her elderly mother just at the same time as my two Barcelona friends, both nurses, wanted to come and stay. They became known as the Barcelona Angels! By the time they went back home to Catalunya I had invitations to stay with them when I was ready.

Barcelona summer — I met Marta at a tango class in Barcelona

When it is time to make decisions, have courage!

As a cautious sort of person I took little steps but it was still scary as I felt the energy of Barcelona pulling me forward while my fears held me back. I couldn’t imagine leaving my animals but neither could I take them with me to a city. Eventually I decided to take three months off work and go to Barcelona to see what happened next. Some friends offered to stay in my home and look after the animals and it felt like a sign that I couldn’t ignore.

Say Yes!

Once in Barcelona I said ‘Yes’ to almost anything that came my way and this included a camping weekend dancing in the Pyrenees. I was pretty ill with bronchitis in my first two weeks here and hardly left the flat because in July the temperatures were horrendous. I was also scared of camping in a small tent with people I didn’t know well, and hesitant about doing a weekend course with a group of people who didn’t speak English. But I said ‘Yes’. On that weekend I met my future partner and my life changed radically from that moment on.

camping in pyrenees — Our campsite in the Pyrenees

It took 5 years

I was 47 when I first went to Barcelona and when I eventually came to stay for those three months, which turned into 5 years, I was 52. I was never a brave person but I believe that following my passion and listening to my heart helped change my life. Friends old and new helped me along the way with their encouragement and generosity and also my faith that one day I would live abroad and learn a new language.

costa brava — My first birthday abroad – on the Costa Brava!

Even the longest journey must begin where you stand

Lao Tzu (604 BC – 531BC)

Have you ever dreamed of living abroad or have you done it already?

What helped you overcome your fears?

Leave a comment to tell us about your experiences and help someone else who is dreaming of moving.

5 ways I have changed since moving to Catalunya

February 14, 2015February 15, 2015 ~ Kate Wilson ~ 10 Comments

Have you ever dreamed of moving to a new country and leaving behind, not only your job, home and familiar life, but also your old personality?

snow-leopard-620554_640 — I know I am shy and retiring but perhaps there’s a wild cat inside?

You want to escape the old you or at least the parts of you that are so tiresome and boring and repetitive and hard to change.

Old thought patterns and habits that hold you back in life. Shyness, timidity, irritability, obsessiveness, laziness, the list goes on. Perhaps the only thing that will jolt you awake is a total change of scenery. The challenges of a new country and the need to start afresh might reveal parts of your personality hitherto unexplored!

I moved to Barcelona with some hopes like these. I am naturally shy and too self conscious especially when I am with strangers. I react badly to criticism and am over-sensitive when I feel rejected. I want to be spontaneous but tend to over-plan everything I do.

I had noticed that Mediterranean people seem to be more confident, outgoing, social, expressive, straight talking, emotional, spontaneous…….. I wanted some of that. I hoped to discover those parts hidden deep in my own psyche and to find a new me!

So what has changed in the 5 years since I moved here?

1. I now find it hard to eat without a napkin although I never needed one before.

People here always use napkins – breakfast, lunch and dinner. Now when eating in the UK I start to twitch and look around me anxiously when there is nothing to wipe my fingers and mouth on. Even when I don’t use a napkin, I want it to be there beside my plate.

2. I turn out lights.

My partner is very concerned about lights being left on and not a day passes without this conversation:-

Him: “Do you need this light on?”

Me: “Yes”

Him: “So why do you have one on in the hall/bathroom/sittingroom/bedroom as well?”

Me: “Because I am moving between rooms”

But I find that now when I go back to the UK I am hyper-aware of people lighting up their houses like Christmas trees and I too go around turning off lights. Even in Granollers, I try not to have more than two rooms lit. I can’t leave a light on without being conscious of it.

3. I eat fruit and vegetables only when they are in season

If they are imported – I don’t. I now can’t buy grapes all year round. I rarely buy kiwis, I don’t expect to have peaches or nectarines except in June and July. Shopping in fresh produce markets has made this change in me. The wonderful fresh fruit and vegetables that are available here make it seem ridiculous to buy imported stuff.

4. I now drink UHT milk in my tea without making a big deal of it

I too used to complain “you can’t get a proper cup of tea in France/Spain/Italy because the milk isn’t fresh.” Now I don’t notice it and I even quite like the fact that our milk lasts so long and that we can store lots of packs of it in the cupboard.

5. I have changed when and how I eat.

I still have breakfast of toast and porridge, but then there is a long gap before lunch which we sometimes eat as late as 4pm. Supper may not happen until 9.30pm or even later. We eat a large lunch and something smaller later. It works for me and feels good for my stomach.

And what about the deeper changes I hoped for?

Have I become a more confident, outgoing, social, expressive, straight talking, emotional, spontaneous person?

This is hard to say. I certainly do have more confidence and am less self conscious. I don’t mind being the stranger in town. I can talk with people who I don’t know and in two different languages. I always was affectionate and because people here kiss and hug and touch each other more often, it is easier for me to do this too. I have learned many new things but am basically still the same person underneath, just a bit older and a lot wiser.

And I have taught myself to shout out “Bravo” and “Molt Be” when the marathon passes!

Have you ever dreamed of moving abroad and starting afresh with a new you?

Perhaps you already made the move and found the ‘old you’ came along too?

I’d love to hear about you. If you have changed your spots by moving home or if you’d like to, leave a comment and tell me what happened.

Thanks for coming to read this post – I hope you’ll come back soon! If you want to stay in touch then Like my Catalan Way Facebook page at the top right of this post or sign up for regular updates.

Till the next one, best wishes from Catalunya and from me, Kate

“Ex-Pat Anger – don’t push me, I bite!”

January 29, 2015February 9, 2015 ~ Kate Wilson ~ 5 Comments

So you’re living in a new and different country, and one day you wake up feeling angry and fed up with everyone and everything

alt="ex-pat anger" — Don’t push me too far!

Some people call this ex-pat anger syndrome

You’ve been here for some years and you’ve really tried to fit in. You do your best to accept the cultural differences and to be open-hearted and accepting but sometimes you just feel so angry you could scream.

People ignore you, they do annoying things like barging in front of you in queues as if you didn’t exist. Or they don’t say ‘thank you’ when you let them pass.

The streets are dirty and when you do find a green place it is strewn with litter.

People don’t smile at you – they all look totally miserable and they sometimes stare at you in the street as if you were an alien. Continue reading →

I need to change so many things

January 25, 2015February 9, 2015 ~ Kate Wilson ~ 2 Comments

January is whizzing by.

Already it is Burn’s night and I feel my feet aren’t touching the ground at the moment as I suddenly have so much to do.

Last year I had the opposite problem. I spent far too much time sitting at home alone, chatting on Skype and reading Facebook messages. I was keeping busy but also marking time, waiting.

My need to change has grown slowly but now the process has taken off.

Last year I made some decisions which will make this year a bit different from the previous ones I have spent in Catalunya.

1. I am planning to walk the Camino from Roncevalles to Santiago de Compostella. 500 miles! This means I should be in training – now! But although I am reading guide books and making lists of what to take, I have to admit I am not yet doing the walking that will get me fit in time for April.

2. I decided last summer that I must change my house situation. I still have a home in Cornwall which is rented out. But it’s not ideal because although I go back in the summer and camp out in a chalet, I don’t have anywhere to stay when it turns cold. What’s more, I spend much of my time in Catalunya wondering where to live and wishing that I had a garden and a proper home but the truth is I do have those things – in Cornwall. It feels like I must sort this out – either use the Cornwall house or let it go.

Decision time.

3. This blog has already changed because last year I made the switch to WordPress and bought the domain name for The Catalan Way. After that I didn’t know how get the blog out into the world so that interested people could see it. Again my need to change was very urgent but I didn’t have the know-how to take action. Then a friend told me about an online blogging course run by Corrina Gordon-Barnes and I decided to invest in this. What is the point of all this writing if hardly anyone sees it? The course began in January and I am now in the process of looking at why I write, who am I writing for and what do those people want to read?

You are reading this so I am interested in you. What do you want to read?

This year started with a lot of new ideas and plans circling around in my head.

As well as all the above:-

I want to get involved in the local dog and cat rescue centre. Since Bonnie died I miss being around dogs and while I am not ready to adopt a new one, I want to do something to help.

Since we moved my piano into our main house I have been trying to practice every day. Still plugging on with the Maple Leaf Rag.

Then there is meditation and yoga. And Spanish lessons. Catalan practice over a coffee once a week with a friend.

I also spend time with Lydia, my friend’s little girl. It is incredible that I had to wait until age 57 but this is the first time in my life that I have had chance to really get to know a small child. Meeting twice a year isn’t enough – it’s the day to day things that bring you together.

I’m also taking photographs of Granollers for my Facebook page. It has become an obsession, walking the streets and looking for quirky details.

And then there are the balnearis – I want to visit them all and then write a guide in English. They are so amazing and not enough people know about them. How many people go to Barcelona and have no idea about the hot mineral bathes only 30 km away?

Are you tired just reading all that?

Perhaps I have taken on too much? But I don’t want to give any of it up. Suddenly I feel that time is not on my side and I don’t want to waste it.

Perhaps you will notice the posts here will change a bit over the next few months. I’ll be experimenting with my writing. Please let me know what works and doesn’t work for you. Gently, of course!

From the end of March I will be sending updates on my walk along the Camino. I will only have a phone so they will be short and sweet! It will be good to keep in touch as, apart from a few etapes when friends are joining me, I will be walking alone. Am I scared? Yes.

And then in the summer, who knows? I certainly don’t.

All I can do is follow an inner voice that is telling me it is time to sort out my own house. I want to change and I need to change. I imagine that after all this thinking and planning, walking the Camino, walk-eat-sleep, will be quite restful.

Goodbye 2014

January 1, 2015January 1, 2015 ~ Kate Wilson ~ 4 Comments

We got back from the skiing trip on December 27th and did a quick turn around, leaving again the next day for the Costa Brava.

Oh what a life! I hear you say.

Yes it is great to have these places on our doorstep and I love travelling around but actually the ski trip was more to please the Resident Adolescent and I was much happier when driving up the AP7 to Figueres. I knew I would be able to relax in the calm beauty of Mas Sant Nicolau and it would be a good way to end this year.

We were sitting in a cafe near the port of Escala today, eating tapas and enjoying the wild sea-scape from a warm dry table and we talked about powerful moments of 2014.

Here are some of mine, in photos

January

The arrival of Phoenix, rescued from a life under a car in Peralada

February

The day Bonnie died. She was very sick and disappeared in the early hours of the morning as we waited until it was time to ring the vet. Just as I began to fall to pieces after searching the woods for hours, I heard she was had been found at a nearby farm. It was like waking up from a nightmare, and remains my strongest moment from the year.

March

My friend Janet came to visit. We went to bathe in the mineral waters of Caldes de Montbui. The Balnearis are hot mineral water spas and there are still many to explore here!

April

Minorca! How can I choose just one photo? It was all a paradise

May

We went on the Tren dels Llacs and Thich Nhat Hanh came to lead a meditation in Barcelona but I have to choose two images of Lydia, my friend Tiffany’s daughter, who has been a delight and a blessing all this year.

June

I was in the UK and saw so many friends and family I can’t chose one day as better than another. A wonderful month with one cloud. My old cat Maisie died and I seriously fell out with one of my neighbours. It made me question if I can live in that house again. But nearby the 3000 year old Merry Maidens give a sense of perspective. See also the Scottish flag?

July

Sunny days in Cornwall. I’m going to cheat and have three photos!

The Barbara Hepworth garden in St Ives with my friend Elizabeth

Then I flew back to Granollers for a week before we drove up to Santander via the Basque Country. We danced a little tango in this pavilion in Pamplona

August

Visiting cave paintings near Santander. There are still many caves open with original art

September

Lots of work in the field at Lamorna. A wall had to be moved and so the digger came!

We drove down through France were in Granollers to watch the Scottish Independence Referendum on TV. I was disappointed with the result but not too surprised.

October

Amma came back to Granollers and I overcame my fear of wearing white. I started my project of recording what I am wearing by taking photos as often as possible and putting them on Instagram.

And my sister came back to visit us! We went to my favourite part of Catalunya – the Costa Brava! I never stop trying to imagine ways I can live there.

November

There was a vote on Independence in Catalunya – not an official one this time. This photo is of the huge demonstration in Barcelona in September calling for the right to vote.

and then I went back to Cornwall to help some friends.

I don’t usually go in November so it was both strange and wonderful

December

Here we are at the end of this year. My strongest moment was losing Bonnie. We have just returned from Sant Nicolau which was the place she died, and where my older dog Blue is also buried. We walked the walk that Bonnie took when she disappeared and ended up at the farm where she was found. There is an Iberic Village there being excavated. The resident dog welcomed us back. She was good to Bonnie too so it was nice to go back and thank her

I know that the change of year means leaving Bonnie in 2014 and it is time for me to walk on into the new mysterious and full of promise year of 2015

I have been sharing old photos on Facebook with my family and here is one of me, reminding me of time passing, of the vitality we enjoy when we are young and of how important it is to never stop living in the moment, exploring the world, laughing and being happy

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